tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4690119989265676870.post5384104804376294265..comments2023-03-25T15:32:51.744+02:00Comments on Mine for the Taking: Chapter Three: Chilled (Part II)FreeFoxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00096319447345952569noreply@blogger.comBlogger1125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4690119989265676870.post-70430847775160136912010-12-03T03:57:39.140+02:002010-12-03T03:57:39.140+02:00Ripping off Frank does make complete and total sen...Ripping off Frank does make complete and total sense to me. If he spotted you, like the girl did in the store earlier, then it would be a different matter.<br /><br />With Frank, I'd suggest maybe letting him introduce himself. Put in whatever first initial dialogue was between the two of you, and get the reader to "spot" him too.<br /><br />The restless sleep passage is kinda drifting, which works well with the fragmentary dreams. Too bad to hear about the fighting. "...betrays a deep seated and little understood hurt." -- I like that line.Andrewhttp://godwillbegod.com/blognoreply@blogger.com